Executive Board:
John Grosz, President
Ryan Brech, Vice President
Steve Mathis, Treasurer
Brian Martin, Secretary
Open, West River Rep.
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Father Must Be Factor In Raising A Child
In Yankton Press and Dakotan: November 30, 1999 - Written by Steve Mathis
Thank you for the positive public response to my recent editorial, “Both Parents Are Needed to Nurture Growing Child”. Fairness and equity must be the foundation of all families before, during and after a divorce. However, in 75 percent of divorces involving children, physical custody goes to the mother and on average, the custodial mother spends 80% of the time with the children compared to only 20% with the father. Fairness and Equity? Is this in the child's best interest? Is it true that only mothers are capable of being the nurturer and caregiver to their children?
There is no question that mothers have an important role in the development of a child but what about the fathers. I believe the statistics speak for themselves. Studies report that 85% of all children that exhibit behavior disorders, 71% of all high school dropouts and 85% of all youths sitting in prisons come from fatherless homes. This is not to say that all children in fatherless homes will end up this way, however there appears to be a significant risk when fathers are not present.
Unfortunately, some fathers (and mothers) abandon their families. Current reports cite the most frequent reasons that fathers fade from their children's lives is the interference of the custodial parent, lack of support and encouragement of the father's involvement by the former spouse (a factor in some states for a change in custody), and the failure of the legal and court system to recognize, understand and respond to the importance to children of being parented by BOTH parents.
Often access and visitation schedules are not sufficient and flexible enough to allow a child's relationship with both parents to grow. For example, according to the South Dakota Child Visitation Guidelines, the non-custodial parent (typically the father) is permitted four overnights with their children per month and one or two, 2-3 hour visits per week. Is this enough for a child's relationship to continue to flourish and grow with his or her father? I suggest it is not, especially when the father is a caring, loving, and involved parent.
It is clear, equal shared parenting between both the father and mother is the key to a healthy child in the face of divorce and should be the law in the State of South Dakota. Whether you are male or female, mother or father, custodial or noncustodial parent and would like to be a partner in establishing a South Dakota Coalition which believes that Children Need Both Parents Equally in the aftermath of divorce, please contact me at (605) 665-3750. I believe this a legacy we can leave our children and future generations.
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